The first 10 lbs Part II

I worked out today! 30 minutes total. And I ran a 1/4 of a mile at 6 mph twice [5 minutes or 1/2 mile total!]. I wanted to see what my out of shape body could do. :)

Let's see how many calories I consumed:

Nutrigrain Bar: 130
Coffee [x 2]: 150
Salad: 200
Mac and Cheese: 500
Bread: 100
Wine: 300
Ginger Ale: 120

Total: 1500

What? Wow! That's awesome!

Thank God. :)

The first 10 lbs: part I

Goal number 1: lose 10 lbs.

I'm aiming for January 1st - but I'll keep on going until I get there. I'm probably not going to post here everyday, but I'm trying to get a handle on how many calories I consume daily. Here's what today's tally looks like:

• Cinnamon bun with icing - 330
  
• coffee with cream at home - 80
  
• two mini energy bars - 200
  
• caramel machiato - 190
  
• Panera bread mac and cheese - 490 [!!]
  
• PB Asian chicken salad - 200
  
• PB wheat bread - 100
  
• Root beer - 160
  
• clementine - 30
  
• Trader Joe's orange chicken and white rice - 400
  
• coffee with cream at home - 80
  
• glass of OJ - 100
  
• 2-3 16 oz jugs of water - 0

Equals - 2360

Yeesh. And I was really trying to watch my intake today. Looks like I'm going to have to make some changes.

My goal is to be healthy; kind to myself, others and the earth; and to do all that as economically minded as possible. As it turns out, Panera Bread isn't healthy or economical. Sigh. Well, can I just say they have the best mac and cheese EVER. And it was worth it. ;)

Truth and lies

Okay. Everything has got to change. Starting this very moment, I've got to turn my weight around, and make the scale go in the other direction.

This is loooong overdue. For the last year and five months I've been "letting myself go". That sounds horrible, but I can't think of another way to describe it. I haven't done it on purpose [on the contrary - I've been trying REALLY hard to get fit], but still, in some ways, however unconscious, I think my actions have been intentional.

I bought the lie. I believed it wholeheartedly, and it deeply affected me.

It's in the magazines. It's on TV. It's online and in movies - all over.

Skinny, beautiful people are better than than their thicker, plumper friends.

Gah.

It makes me sick to write it down, to put it out there. I know it's not true. But there's a difference between knowing and knowing.

I've been struggling, wrestling with this for a while now. But I didn't know how dark it truly was. I couldn't fathom the extent of the damage believing had done to my psyche. And then, the other day, while my husband and I were having a moment, I just began to sob. And it hit me. Hard. Deep down in my marrow, I realized, I didn't feel like I deserved his affection. I didn't understand it - why . . . how he could be attracted to me. I didn't believe it. What I believed . . . was a lie.

I couldn't convey what I felt. I couldn't explain it to him. I sobbed silently. We both accepted the awkwardness of the moment. This was not the first time I'd broken down at an inconvenient time.

But, it was the first time I knew why.

I feel that gaining this weight is a part of my story. Although I hate it, I'm grateful for what it is teaching me. I think I've known that I was believing a lie. That lie got me thin the first time. But it also got me fat. That, and my deeply-embedded insecurities [ie: more lies] - the ones that say that I'm nothing, that I'm a mess, that I don't deserve good things] - they are keeping me from becoming a physically healthy individual.

That's over. Those lies, they will not define me anymore. I will become free from their burdens - through prayer and other spiritual disciplines. I pray to honor each day as the gift that it is. I pray to honor my body, my temple.

It's time to begin the rest of life.

I weigh 180 lbs. Holy crap. I can't believe I just confessed that! I've lost my mind.

Those pounds are too much for my 5'3.5" frame. I get tired a lot more easily now. I don't have much energy. Exercise used to excite me - pump me up. Now, it mildly scares me. I know I can get back into shape. For a while now, I've felt I lacked the motivation. I'm not going to let that stop me anymore.

I'm learning how to not procrastinate. I'm learning that sometimes, it's necessary to do the work - regardless of how I *feel*.

I've got some new goals in mind - and I'm excited about seeing them to fruition and beyond:

• I want to wholeheartedly accept the truth that I am a child of God. That my weight means nothing to God as far as my worth is concerned.
  
• I want to guard against gluttony and vanity.
  
• I want to prayerfully learn self-discipline.
• The journey has begun - I'm on it - even if I mess up - I'm still ambling toward my Creator. I'd like to delve deeper into the implications of this truth. With weighty issues, I often feel that I'm starting over every other day. I'm not. Even if I gain 100 lbs, I'm still on this journey.
• I am beautiful. My voice, my passions, my gifts - God can use them just as much when I'm 180lbs as when I'm 135 lbs. I have been given a purpose and it works on a sliding scale.
• My daughter - she watches me. She's learning the truths and the lies that I hold dear. I will prayerfully try to practice the truths that God is teaching me - so that she may learn them, too. So that she might not have to stumble in the ways I have stumbled.

Dear God . . .

Help me. Guide me. These lies I've believed [or, believe right now] - they are so destructive. What is Your truth, God? I want to hear Your truth.



Haha! I think God is telling me I already know it . . . and that I need to go write my papers. :)

Today is the day!

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince comes out at 12:01am tonight!

I don't know if you can tell . . . I'm ridiculously excited. I only been to a midnight movie once or twice before - and it's never been Harry Potter. Plus, I saw all the movies before I read all the books, so number 6 is the first book I read before seeing the movie. And it looks like it's going to be soooo good!

But this is not about that. This is about me slacking off and not writing last night. This is about me not really keeping track today. Boo on me.

I'm still excited about my epiphany, tho. I think it will eventually change my life.

Let's see if I can remember what I ate yesterday . . .

Nutrigrain Bar [130]
Coffee [80]


Err. I can't remember it all. I know what I ate for dinner and breakfast but the middle of the day is all fuzzy.

Let's see if I can do better today:

Nutrigrain Bar [130]
Coffee [80]
Nutrigrain Bar [130]
Dark Chocolate [60]
Half of a P'zone [680] HOLY CRAP!
Candy [300]
Fresca [0]
Lime Tortilla Chips and Sour Cream [200?]
Tacos [600?]
Sam Adams Light [120]

Total Damage: 2300.

Ugh. And considering I'll be up until like 3am this morning, there is a good chance there's more to come. But, I did a heck of a lot better today than I did the other day. So, it seems there is hope for me yet. I've kind of fallen off the exercise wagon [and I'm not getting back on tonight - but maybe tomorrow . . .]

No worries, tho. It's HP mania time! Go Griffindor!

A Push and an Epiphany [Day.Four]

[Editor's Note: Dude, you've got to see this movie.]

Ahhh! I'm getting behind on the daily blog writing goodness. I started this last night at 12:30am [which is still yesterday for me]. We started watching a movie [I'll rave about that in a minute]. My original intent was to finish my blog after the movie, but by that time it was 3am and I couldn't muster the energy to sit up in bed.

So, I decided to blog AS SOON AS I awoke today. And, [drum roll, please] that's exactly what I'm doing! This is exciting on so many levels.

Now, of course, I could add that my "awoke time" was a bit later than usual [Noon thirty to be exact - but, since I didn't go bed until almost 4am, I didn't exactly "oversleep", I just adjusted my schedule slightly . . . ]

Sigh. So now I've got to remember what I ate yesterday. This will be a good exercise for me, tho, because I don't feel like I ate a lot and yet the scale wasn't very kind to me [I'm refraining from daily scale updates - I'm going to post weekly since I fluctuate so much].

Hmm. Okay. What did I eat?

A Nutrigrain bar on the way to church, I think [130]

Coffee with Cream [150]

A doughnut [Ms. Beverly, one of the sweetest women EVER, who volunteers her time picking up, setting up and giving out the doughnuts and the bagels at church every Sunday, knows my favorite [Chocolate Kreme Filled] and saves one for me (:] [310]

A bagel and cream cheese on my way to the Little Gym interview [400]

Ginger Ale on my way [long trip from CRCC to TLG] [200]

Piece of Dark Chocolate [60]

Coffee [80]

Ice Cream [300]

Wendy's Spicy Asian [I was sucked in by the commercial - it was kind of a mistake] [550]

Root Beer at Priscilla and Mike's [160]

Coffee with Caramel and Cream [250]

Tuna Melt [Jermaine made tuna, it was awesome!] and a couple crackers [400]

An orange [50]


Wow. It's all very clear now. I did NOT do well.

Grand Total: 3040

OH my goodness. I had NO idea.

Funnily [as Amie Berryhill would say], I don't feel like I failed. I feel empowered. I thought I did well, and I was pissed because I thought the scale was just being mean. Now that I know I can not do that again. Live and learn. :)

Emotions - I felt pretty awesome all day yesterday. I felt very alive. I guess it should be noted that I was majorly wiped out after the interview. An hour a half of jumping up and down with crazy five year olds [which I have to admit - I loved] and the mental strain of knowing my every move was being evaluated]. Also, I was tired last night while watching the crazy late movie, but opted for the orange because I didn't want to blow my diet. :P Riiight.

Two more things:

Push - ohMYgosh, this movie was so good! It may be one of my new favorites. A must watch, for sure.

I had an epiphany last night [I love it when that happens]. Of course, it's one of those "everyone knows this already, it just really hit home last night for some reason" [yay God!]. I realized that I don't need to set a time where I'm supposed to have reached my weight loss goal. I've been a little bummed that I wouldn't be "bikini ready" this summer. But, this is "rest of my life" stuff. And if it is truly about changing the way I eat, move, breathe and live, then it doesn't matter when I get there. The important thing is that I'm going.

I had a fabulous weekend. I hope you did too. I'm pretty sure I love you. And if not, I'm really trying to. Happy Monday!

Ready.Set.Skinny.Revamp.Day.Three

My husband is incredibly strong. He's also very serious. But holding these orbs in place is super tiring.

As a result, he has fallen asleep face-down over the covers diagonally and is snoring loudly right next to me. I may hog the covers, but that's better than taking up the whole daggone bed.

Ahem.

Let's get down to it:

Breakfast: Chocolate chip cookie, a plum and a Starbucks mocha [which I allowed myself since I got up early to go and clean for someone]. My mood was up there. I like cleaning for people: they get a clean home, I get a clear head. [70+40+170]

Lunch: Weird stuff - I just munched since I was working. I was offered a PB&J but I politely declined. I don't like to stop working to eat [which is funny because when I was a smoker I used to take LOTS of smoke breaks]. When I do eat, I inhale [hmm, perhaps a byproduct of my smoking days . . . ]. Throughout the day I had: 2 FiberOne bars, a small bag of chips, and 2 miniature dark chocolate bars. [130+130+160+100]

Coffee at home as I got ready for Politics and Prose. Spirits were soaring. Good times. [70]

At the bookstore I ate a Nutrigrain bar while I listened to Mr. Soodalter speak. Afterward we had dinner at the little coffeeshop cafe. I had a grilled ham, cheese and apple sandwich. Jermaine was skeptical about the apple. He is so closeminded. ;) Ooh, and a cup of decaf joe, too. [130+ 300+ 100]

At home I gave in to my craving for ice cream. But I resisted the urge to go in for round two. [250]

Toe-tally: 1650! Sixteen- Fifty!? Woo-hoo! Best so far. Yeehaw.

Biggest regret of the day: Not taking enough pictures. Boo. :(

Good night wonderful person. Thank you for taking time from your day to read my silly blog.

Ready.Set.Skinny.Revamp.Day.Two

Man, I miss this kid!

It's only day 2 and I already don't feel like blogging. But I'm gonna. Because I'm cool like that.

Here's the rundown:

Coffee [70]
FiberOne Bar [130]

11am - I woke up late. I had a really hard time falling asleep last night. I met the morning with a very moody disposition.

Chips [200]

12:30pm - Since I woke up late I wanted something to eat, but wasn't ready for lunch yet. Feeling alright, perhaps still moody.

Grilled Cheese [300]

1pm - This was lunch.

Oatmeal Cookie Sandwich [170]

3pm - Bad fight with Jermaine. We made up, but not before I ate away some pain with this cookie.

Broccoli and cheese soup [350]
Asiago Roast Beef Sandwich [350]
Green Tea [80]

5pm - I think I might be over-estimating the amounts here. I was better by this point. And I ran into a friend of mine at Panera where I bought this food, which was fun. But, by the end of the meal I was feeling guilty for spending so much money on dinner and waaay [too] full.

Coffee [80]

5:30pm - Downed this right before Zumba class, as usual. But it didn't go well. I don't know if it was the coffee, but I ended up having to leave the class early because I felt sick to my stomach.

Total so far: 1730

Since then I've had:

Cookie [70]
Ice Cream [200]
Ice Cream Again [100]

10 -11pm - Yikes. Wanted some kind of snack. Think I went in the wrong direction. My mood was decent, though. I tried not to go overboard, and I don't think I did. But in hindsight, I should have had the plum I was considering instead. :)

Grand Total: 2100

Blah. Not good. But at least I'm keeping track.

Aiming to drink lots more water tomorrow.

Good night!

We're Back to Counting Days

[Yay! I felt beautiful at my reunion, even if I wasn't as thin as I would have liked.]

Hello world!

I've been working on this blog for about two hours, but I had the TV on and was getting absolutely nowhere.

So, click.

Time to get down to business.

I just reread my last blog and it made me really happy. I've been doing a lot of soul searching these past few months, working on being comfortable in my own skin, figuring who I am and what makes me tick. I've thought of that blog often, but I was thinking, [and this sounds really bad] 'Ok, so now I've got to be healthy and not obsess, and lose the weight but not too fast and yada yada yada.' Almost like the "good works" way to getting skinny instead of the "saved by grace through faith" way.

I'd totally forgotten the "Imagine" part of the blog!

That's the best part! Sigh.

Time to back up, revisit and remember.

What was I imagining again? Oh, yes, this:

Imagine myself daring to dream that I could be really, truly healthy in mind, body and soul. Imagine myself filling up on yummy, healthful foods. Imagine exercising practically day and absolutely loving it. Imagine food and exercise becoming opportunities to love and spend time with God and people. Imagine really feeling good and warm and energetic and getting those feelings from Jesus and people and exercise and not from caffeine or sugar. Imagine not obsessing over my bathroom scale. Imagine feeling comfortable in my own skin. Imagine becoming an aerobics instructor and being qualified and excited to teach others these wonderful things that God is teaching me. Imagine helping other people dare to dream this dream for themselves.

That is truly madly deeply so so SO what I want. And so it is with that sentiment that I restart this blog. It will be modeled after the Ready.Set.Skinny blog I kept on Myspace - I'm aiming for humorous healthful goodstuff. I'll be posting what I ate, how many calories it added up to, the exercises I do and how much I burned. I'm going to add in the times I ate, and my moods during my chow sessions and post-exercise.

I know that I'll keep it up for at least 30 days, to try to establish a healthful routine. After that, we'll see what happens. But if you're interested you'll have something new to read everyday for at least a month!

I didn't eat very healthfully today, but in the spirit of not waiting until morning to start getting skinny, I'm going to post it.

Breakfast: FiberOne Bar [130]
Coffee (yes, I'm back on the 'feine) [70]
Ginger Ale [120]
Tuna Salad Sandwich a la Priscilla [200ish]
Cottage Cheese [100ish]
Chocolate Chip Cookies (6?) [360]
Chips [400]
Ice Cream with whipped cream and chocolate syrup [300]
BBQ Chicken Pizza [300]
Coffee [150]
Ginger Ale [100]

Yikes. Survey says: Total - 2230

Oh my.

Hmm, well, you have to start somewhere, right?

I think I want to aim for about 1400 calories a day for now and see how that goes. Wish me luck!

I did exercise today! I forced myself to go, but I was glad I did. I walked/ran on the treadmill for 42 minutes. 300 calories and almost 3 miles. I was extremely tired right after I did it, but I think it gave me energy to work on this blog. (:

I'm not sure about my moods while I ate, I'll have to write it down as the day goes on, I think.

Ooh, almost forgot - the not-so-fun part. My weight and measurements.

As of right this moment I'm 168[ish] and I measure in at 36-31-43. The 31 is the skinniest part of my waist. The belly button part of my waist is closer to 38 or 39. Youch. That's not fun to write.

But it will be fun to watch it come off! And it will be fun to do it the God way. Because, honestly, the Brandy way pretty much blows.

And I'm convinced that God cares about this. Which is pretty amazing.

This Changes Everything

[Editor's Note: This blog was originally written for and posted on my other blog yesterday - but it has too much to do with this blog not to post it here, too.]

Jermaine took this picture on my honeymoon. I felt even then that the scale had begun to move in the wrong direction. I didn't know how to stop it or how bad it was going to get. I think I'll look back on this time, though, and thank God for the what he's allowed me to learn from all this.

[Caution: Long Blog Alert]

As you may or may not know, I've been struggling with weight/self-esteem/overeating/gluttony/addiction issues for most of my adult life. In 2007 I set out on a quest to become Super-Fit-Aerobics-Mom. I thought I had it figured out. I lost 20 lbs, gained a considerable amount of muscle, got certified as an aerobics instructor and looked fabulous for my wedding pictures last June.

So, of course, I was quite taken aback when my scale began to skyrocket back up shortly after my honeymoon. And now, less than a year later, I have packed on 30 extra pounds.

I wasn't expecting this. I thought I had this. But, looking back, I must admit that this is not a new phenomenon:

• My senior year of high school I moved from my little town in Virginia to [what I saw as] the Big City of Charlotte, NC. By the time I graduated, I had gained 15 lbs.
• I gained 35 lbs while I was pregnant and only lost 15 during childbirth. During the early months of Sadie's life I suffered from an intense case of postpartum depression. At 168 lbs, I was heavier than I ever had been.
• A year and half later, I became a vegetarian [mostly to fit in at the head shop I was working at] and lost 30 lbs. It wasn't healthy, tho. I was living off of diet coke and cigarettes [and the occasional Midnight MilkyWay]
• A year after that I found Jesus [or he found me] and began to work on some of my unhealthy habits. That same year, one of my worst nightmares became a reality. As a result, I added 25 lbs back on to my petite frame.
• In 2006 I moved to Maryland. It was an exciting, tumultuous time. I lost 1o lbs in the months leading up to the move. Toward the end of August, Jermaine and I broke up for a time and I went on the "break-up" diet [not eating because I was so depressed] and lost another 10 lbs. By November we were an item again. I was happy and as a result I gained 15 lbs over winter break. That was an embarrassing spring semester. Around that time I began to formulate the Ready. Set. Skinny. program and that pretty much leads us up to today.

Of course, although I knew this was sort of a pattern, this is probably the first time I've ever fleshed it out[with bullet points and stuff]. It all started this past weekend. I got to attend a leadership retreat at my church. It was quite fantastic, and would seemingly have nothing to do with the subject of weight loss. But you must understand, I think about this ALL the time. I'd even begun to wonder if I had a disorder of some kind because my behavior seemed to border on obsession.

It was near the end of the second day. We had just finished a section on leadership and vision and were asked to spend some time on our own reflecting about what we'd learned and discovered. I was itching to get out. I felt an acute desire to be alone with God but I wasn't really thinking about leadership. I was thinking about this weight thing. I had a sense that God was about to reveal something to me.

Our church is set on 63 acres of beautiful land and there is an amazing prayer walk meandering through the forest on the property. I set out and as I walked I poured out my heart to God.

'There seems to be some kind of disconnect,' I exclaimed to the Lord. I want to eat right and exercise but, my desire to eat yummy fattening foods and sit on my butt seems win out quite frequently. I knew I needed to reevaluate my priorities, my past and present failures and accomplishments and my motives for wanting to lose the weight.

For the past several days I have been more and more aware that my reasons for losing weight suck. My high school reunion is in 3 months and I have been saying that I want to get back in shape to look good for it. In the same breath I would acknowledge that there is something wrong with that line of thinking but that I didn't care, I needed to prove to myself and my former classmates that I could do it.

I thought, 'If only I didn't have the pressure of the reunion.' I know that I could kick myself into high gear and lose 20 or 30 lbs. But it seems so futile because I know I'll just balloon right back up again afterward.

We had just talked about vision and I love the Cedar Ridge Vision. So I thought, maybe I need a vision like that for myself and my weight and all the underlying baggage that comes with it. With tears in my eyes I began to spout out my own raw, unedited vision:

Imagine myself daring to dream that I could be really, truly healthy in mind, body and soul. Imagine myself filling up on yummy, healthful foods. Imagine exercising practically day and absolutely loving it. Imagine food and exercise becoming opportunities to love and spend time with God and people. Imagine really feeling good and warm and energetic and getting those feelings from Jesus and people and exercise and not from caffeine or sugar. Imagine not obsessing over my bathroom scale. Imagine feeling comfortable in my own skin. Imagine becoming an aerobics instructor and being qualified and excited to teach others these wonderful things that God is teaching me. Imagine helping other people dare to dream this dream for themselves.

It's not completely, er, complete. But the magic of the Backspace Button has allowed me to make it sound much more polished than it did yesterday in the woods.

This all sounds well and good, but the next thing I thought was, 'how do I get there?' I'm pretty good at dreaming the dreams. I'm slightly lacking in the figuring out the logistics part. And, honestly, those words amount to hogwash if I don't figure that part out.

So I asked God to help me to connect the disconnect. I sat down on a log and prayed for the wisdom to work this stuff out. And then it hit me. Or, well, maybe he hit me. I was being incredibly superficial. Why is it so important for me to look a certain way for a group of people I haven't seen in 10 years? Sure, it may make feel good about myself for a day. But, it may make some people feel bad about themselves that same day. And it may even make some people feel bad about me that day. So, what is the point, really? Am I really not that far removed from high school?

More tears filled my eyes as I realized [rather melodramatically] that I was going to have to let this go. I was going to have to accept where I stood on this journey and be okay with wherever I stand come June. This means maybe I'll weigh the same. Maybe I'll lose 20 lbs. I need to work on being okay either way.

It was exhilarating. The best thing I know to compare it to is the way I felt when I gave my life to Jesus. But I don't want to sound sacrilegious. I love to see being a follower of Jesus as being on a quest. And that's what this feels like. There are differences, of course [the endings vary quite a bit]. And my Christian quest encompasses every part my life whereas this essentially could be considered a smaller adventure on the big picture map.

I haven't mentioned the guilt/shame element yet. And I think, in some ways that is the most beautiful part. And the one that has left me feeling so wonderful.

Guilt is something I am very familiar with. In fact, God is teaching me in other areas of my life that I have this strange tendency to make all these rules and regulations for myself, and to set a strict schedule in my day to day life. The comedic irony is that I'm not a very disciplined person [well, I think it's funny]. I'm constructing all these laws and at the same time proclaiming that I hate legalism. This breeds within me a ridiculous amount of guilt. I never feel that I can measure up to the high expectations that I make for myself.

My friend Priscilla suggested the other day that perhaps I was getting some sort of pay off from the guilt. Maybe it somehow fueled the vicious cycle. IE: I make rules. I fail. I feel guilty. I give up. I indulge some more.

I don't know if that's exactly what she meant and I don't want to misrepresent her, but I think she's on to something. The same kind of thing has been happening over and over in this weight loss quest.

Now, I usually start out every weight loss venture with some good old fashioned gluttony. Think cheesecake and ice cream and candy, oh my! I don't want to do that anymore. This journey [that in many ways I have been preparing for for years] began yesterday on that log. And I am free to eat whatever I want. I am free to exercise whenever I want.

And I have surrendered this entire thing to God. It's all his. I pray that he uses me help others as an aerobics instructor [and thus, we come full circle and see that, by golly, this does have something to do with leadership]. I am so excited. I freaking love adventures.

Road trip!

Thank you for reading my blog. ;)

PS. I just wanted to add this: I'm thinking this is probably a bit old hat for some people. I've been hearing and reading things of this sort since I first subscribed to Womens' Health magazine two years ago. But it never really sunk in. So for me - it's brand spanking new [and pretty darn spectacular].

Days Zero, One, Two and Three

New Plan.

60 days to skinny. Or fit. Or healthy. Or whatever makes you feel good about yourself.

Today is day 3. Not going so well. I've actually gained 2 lbs. I'm not losing heart yet, tho. I'm hoping that by putting a time limit on it I will stick to it.

Here is the plan as recorded on this group I started on Facebook called "Nothing in my closet fits anymore":

Part I - Food
1200 calories a day six days a week
1500 calories on Saturdays

It will hopefully look like this:

Coffee* and breakfast bar - 200

Snack - 100

Lunch - 300

Snack - 100

Dinner - 300-400

Snack - 100-200

And then, lots and lots of water.

I've done it before. I can do it again.

Part II - Exercise
Workout six days a week
Rest on Sundays

Monday - Run for 30 minutes

Tuesday - Weight training/Running

Wednesday - Aerobics Class

Thursday - Weight training/Running

Friday - Aerobics Class

Saturday - Aerobics Class

I picked these times and activities because they fit into my schedule. It is usually very difficult for me to figure out when I'm going to work out. It came pretty easily this time. That must mean it's time. Feel free to pick the times and activities that work best for you. If you need help with that, I'll be happy to do so.

As you may have guessed, I'm am inviting all of you to join me. You can start your 60 days whenever you want. But, let's get on with the success stories!

It is notable that I am also working on a Part III - Afterwards. It will be a maintenance regime so that we don't gain the bloody weight back again.

Friday [Day Zero] I ate fattening chocolate dessert and took a Zumba Class. Unfortunately I did those two activities too close together and got a little sick.

Saturday I thought I did alright. I ate my 1500 calories [I think] and took another Zumba class. But Sunday morning I had somehow gained weight.

Sunday I succumbed to the temptation to eat 3 pieces of pizza.

Today I weighed in at 165lbs ): [which is what I weighed yesterday].

My immediate goal is to not consume more than 1200 calories and hit the apartment gym for 30 minutes. Both will be challenging since I won't make it home tonight until late and I have a midterm tomorrow. But I'm not going to be too hard on myself. An appropriate cliche about trying and trying again should be inserted here.

Wish me luck!

Old Myspace Blogs

I used to blog on MySpace everyday. It was a weight loss thing. And, boy, did it motivate me. I was reading some of them today. Man o man, was I determined! I had set my mind to it and I was on fire.

I'd almost forgotten. I think looking back on those blogs can be a source of great motivation now. In other news, my writing style has changed tremendously [and not necessarily in a good way [my old way was so full of whimsy, it was kind of nice]].

So I think I'm going to attempt to put those blogs on here somehow. And, in the process, or the meantime, or whatever, I'm going to try to keep up this blog more often.

Here we go [say it with me]: AGAIN! Yeehaw.

P.S. Here's the link, buddy. (: You gotta hit "older" a couple times to get to the good stuff.